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Wilson, Harry Leon, 1867-1939

"Ruggles of Red Gap"


Sausages, to be sure, have their place, and beer as well, but
sauerkraut I have never been able to regard as an at all possible food
for persons that really matter. Germans, to be sure!
Discreetly I renewed my inquiry: "I dare say the Honourable George was
in good form?" I suggested.
"Well, he et a lot. Him and the piano guy was bragging which could eat
the most sausages."
I was unable to restrain a shudder at the thought of this revolting
contest.
"The piano guy beat him out, though. He'd been at the Palace Hotel for
three meals and I guess his appetite was right craving."
"And afterward?"
"Well, it was like Jackson said: this lad wanted to while away the
tejum of a Sunday afternoon, and so he whiled it, that's all. Purty
soon Mis' Kenner set down to the piano and sung some coon songs that
tickled him most to death, and then she got to playing ragtime--say,
believe me, Bill, when she starts in on that rag stuff she can make a
piano simply stutter itself to death.
[Illustration: MIS' KENNER SET DOWN TO THE PIANO AND SUNG SOME COON
SONGS THAT TICKLED HIM MOST TO DEATH]
"Well, at that the piano guy says it's great stuff, and so he sets
down himself to try it, and he catches on pretty good, I'll say that
for him, so we got to dancing while he plays for us, only he don't
remember the tunes good and has to fake a lot.


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