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Wilson, Harry Leon, 1867-1939

"Ruggles of Red Gap"

You ought to hear me some day when I'm feeling
right!"
"Really!" exclaimed the other with elaborate sarcasm.
"Yes, sir. Surest thing you know. I could call you a lot of good
things right now if so many ladies wasn't around. You don't think I'd
be afraid, do you? Why, Bill there had you licked with one wallop."
"But really, really!" protested the other with a helpless shrug to the
ladies, who were gasping with dismay.
"You ruffian!" cried his wife.
"Egbert Floud," said Mrs. Effie fiercely, "you will apologize to
Charles before you leave this room. The idea of forgetting yourself
that way. Apologize at once!"
"Oh, very well," he grumbled, "I apologize like I'm made to." But he
added quickly with even more irritation, "only don't you get the idea
it's because I'm afraid of you."
"Tush, tush!" said Belknap-Jackson.
"No, sir; I apologize, but it ain't for one minute because I'm afraid
of you."
"Your bare apology is ample; I'm bound to accept it," replied the
other, a bit uneasily I thought.
"Come right down to it," continued Cousin Egbert, "I ain't afraid of
hardly any person. I can be pushed just so far." Here he looked
significantly at Mrs. Effie.
"After all I've tried to do for him!" she moaned. "I thought he had
something in him.


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