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Ryder, Annie H

"Hold Up Your Heads, Girls! : Helps for Girls, in School and Out"

The world is indeed beautiful, and
the best part of it all is the people in it. We are to love as many of
them as we can, but are called upon to reveal our inmost selves to few,
very few, friends.
Valuing friendship more than any other earthly blessing, I think it
wrong for girls to encourage that moodiness which flatters them they
can do without friends, especially of their own sex. Nothing can conduce
more to happiness: nothing is brighter, more charming, more helpful
than the interchange of friendship among young women. Who wouldn't
be a girl always if she could be sure all the other girls would stay
so too, and go on in that delightful exchange of affection and fine
feeling which is the very ecstacy of living?
Now, what does a girl prize most in another girl whose friendship she
enjoys? or, rather, what should she value in her most? In the first
place, constancy,--a knowledge that her friend will always be hers;
and then honesty,--a feeling that, if she says, "Now, don't you tell,"
the friend won't tell. By the way, this binding to secrecy is a very
bad practice, however delightful. It places too great a responsibility
on one's friend, leads her into temptation, makes her curious, and,
in nine times out of ten, one has no right to tell one's self, or one
would not be so cautious.
Honesty implies more than this, however: it demands that your friend
shall not herald abroad your mistakes or improprieties, though she
may disapprove of them.


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