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Ryder, Annie H

"Hold Up Your Heads, Girls! : Helps for Girls, in School and Out"


Discretion in conversation really implies a peculiar tact of woman,
a kind of cleverness, not so frequently found in men, and very seldom
met with in boys. When a woman sees her guests are led by a monopolizer
along unsafe channels of thought, she can easily, by that happy faculty
of hers, bring them back again where all will run smoothly. She can
change the subject by some little remark irrelevant to it. Perhaps
adaptability comes from discretion. When you are talking with
Englishmen,--well, do not talk quite as Englishmen do, though they
may be perfectly sincere; but talk as Americans talk. Say _a_
the way they do in Boston, or wherever else you may belong: stick to
your own town's forms of speech so long as they are reasonable. Above
all things, do not ape the peculiar pronunciations of certain
individuals. Affectation, imitation in talk, is ruinous. Be yourselves!
Girls and boys are not themselves as much as they ought to be.
Being honest, still adapt yourselves to new people as you would to
new scenes: talk with the Englishman on such subjects as he prefers.
When you are speaking with honest country people about the beauty of
their fields, do not talk about "Flora spreading her fragrant mantle
on the superficies of the earth, and bespangling the verdant grass
with her beauteous adornments." Use baby talk to babies; kind and simple
words to the aged; a good, round, cheerful word to the girls, almost
slang,--though no, not quite that! Make the grocer feel you have an
interest in groceries; the seamstress an interest in sewing, as of
course you have; and the doctor an interest in sickness.


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