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Eliot, George, 1819-1880

"Adam Bede"

When our indignation is borne in submissive
silence, we are apt to feel twinges of doubt afterwards as to our own
generosity, if not justice; how much more when the object of our anger
has gone into everlasting silence, and we have seen his face for the
last time in the meekness of death!
"Ah! I was always too hard," Adam said to himself. "It's a sore fault in
me as I'm so hot and out o' patience with people when they do wrong, and
my heart gets shut up against 'em, so as I can't bring myself to forgive
'em. I see clear enough there's more pride nor love in my soul, for I
could sooner make a thousand strokes with th' hammer for my father than
bring myself to say a kind word to him. And there went plenty o' pride
and temper to the strokes, as the devil WILL be having his finger in
what we call our duties as well as our sins. Mayhap the best thing I
ever did in my life was only doing what was easiest for myself. It's
allays been easier for me to work nor to sit still, but the real tough
job for me 'ud be to master my own will and temper and go right against
my own pride. It seems to me now, if I was to find Father at home
to-night, I should behave different; but there's no knowing--perhaps
nothing 'ud be a lesson to us if it didn't come too late.


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